My Cheeky Three-Year Old

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True story:

At breakfast, I had finished everything but my coffee and a few bites of my muffin (carrot-ginger, if you must know!). Charlotte was eating like a slow-poke (as usual) and I was trying to cajole her to eat her yogurt. So, I said, “Look, I finished my yogurt,” and I took a sip of coffee. She looked at me and said, “Mommy, I appreciate that you are thirsty, but you really need to finish your muffin.”

I nearly fell off my chair hearing her repeat to me the things I say to her to get her to eat. I’m sure she doesn’t truly understand what she’s saying. And she can barely pronounce “appreciate.” I'm learning more and more what I sound like as a parent as my little parrot role plays with me. Sometimes it's not terribly flattering and I try hard to retool my approach when I hear things I don't like being repeate. Sometimes it's just unbearably funny, like this morning.





Another true story (written here with Philippe's express permission):

I said something really fast and she thought I said “I’m Baxter.” (Baxter is my brother's dog.) And the following conversation ensued:

Me: You thought I said, “I’m Baxter”? And that was so funny?
C: Yeah
Me: But, I’m mommy, I can’t be Baxter.
C: But Baxter can be a mommy one day.
Me: Not really, because Baxter is a boy. Do you think you might grow up to be a mommy?
C: No.
Me: No?
C: No, I’m going to grow up to be a daddy.
Me: How are you going to do that? Daddies are boys.
C: Well, I’m going to grow up to be a big man. I’m going to grow my hair big.
Me: Oh?
C: Yeah, I’m going to grow my hair big so I can have a beard. And I’m going to grow a big head. Because Daddy has a big head, so I’m going to grow a big head, too.


At this point I was laughing too hard to remember the rest. Note—I did not prompt any of Charlotte’s comments. And at no point in this life on earth have I talked about the size of Philippe's noggin (which, contrary to popular opinion is no larger than average, we've measured and compared!).